What’s the problem with giving kids a head start on education? Well, kids born after September 1 can be as much as a year-and-a-half younger than their classmates.
My husband and I agonized for months about whether to send our fall baby to kindergarten. Would “good” parents comply with the California cutoff date? As a first grade teacher, I witnessed the disadvantages my younger students faced daily. “Redshirted” students, children whose parents had opted to wait a year for kindergarten, learned new concepts with relative ease. They stood up for themselves and generally got along better with other kids, too.
Our daughter’s preschool teacher assured my husband and me that our little one was ready for kindergarten. We were unconvinced. Sure, she could read and calculate numbers in her head. But, could she get through the day without crying over a perceived slight? Would she make it to the bathroom on time? What do you do with a child who has advanced brain smarts, but is behind socially?
We spent long hours weighing pros and cons. Finally, we decided to enroll our daughter in an academic preschool to give her time to mature. At the end of the first week Daddy asked, “What was the best part of your day?”
“When you picked me up,” she answered with quivering lips and tear-filled eyes. “These kids can’t even read.”
Another stressful conversation followed after bedtime. Her feeling out of place defeated the purpose of giving her another year. How bad would it be if she were one of the youngest students in her class for the rest of her school days? My father-in-law lovingly reminded us, “The beauty of making a decision that doesn’t work is you can make a new one.” Our little girl started kindergarten at the neighborhood school a week late, rather than a year.
The truth: there was no perfect solution. Now in high school, our daughter performs at the top of her class, and she stands 5 feet, 10 inches in the flattest shoes. She still reads young adult fiction, loves Disney Channel and she will get her driver’s license later than most of her friends.
Developing an outside interest has helped to alleviate social pressures. Her love for competitive tennis keeps her having fun and focused on accomplishment, instead of keeping up with peers.
Yes, our daughter would be more emotionally equipped to leave for college at 18 rather than 17. Still, under the circumstances, starting our fall baby in kindergarten appears to have been the best choice.
Trish Wilkinson, a veteran teacher, is writing a parenting book called Grade by Grade: Excellent Elementary Education. She is the mother of two girls in Bonita.
