The Ultimate Gift
I found it shocking that people protested actress Salma Hayek’s recent decision to breastfeed a starving baby for a desperate mother in Africa. Luckily Tara, a friend I had met taking Lamaze classes, also wasn’t squeamish.
My baby came early, and my daughter’s sensitive little system could not easily digest anything but mother’s milk. To complicate matters, I had to leave her to attend a three-week, full-day class when she was 4 months old. Tara was at home with her 3-month-old son, so she graciously offered to care for my baby.
I spent diligent sessions with a breast pump, but my daughter refused to drink the milk from a bottle. She screamed and cried until she was swollen, red and gagging. Exhausted and frantic, Tara gave up on the bottle and sat down to nurse my baby. My daughter latched on to the unfamiliar breast, sneaking peeks up at Tara’s face that made them both smile. Full and contented, my baby returned to her good-natured self.
When I arrived to pick up my daughter that day, Tara apologetically told me she had breastfed my baby because she had been at her wits’ end. It had never occurred to me that people worry about such things. Most of us drink milk that comes from a cow. Why would milk that my child drinks from another mother, one I know to eat healthy and take care of herself, bother me? I hugged Tara and thanked her for her generosity, relieved to know that she would breastfeed my baby, if needed.
I continued to send expressed milk, and we tried different nipples and bottles. Still, Tara ended up nursing my baby, at least once or twice a day, for all three weeks. When the class was over, I watched Tara’s son for her on occasion, and I breastfed her baby as well. His loud gulps, as opposed to my daughter’s dainty ones, made me laugh. I will never forget those big brown eyes staring up at me as he filled his belly.
Tara’s family has since moved to the Sacramento area. Telephone conversations are nice, but I miss the time we spent together. Sharing something so intimate and special with another mom and our children forged a friendship for which I will always be grateful.
Read more about this subject in our follow-up article, Cross-Nursing Controversy.
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Bonita author Patricia Wilkinson is the mother of two girls. She’s currently writing Grade by Grade, a reference book to help parents get the most out of elementary education.
